“Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever.” - Lance Armstrong
Lance Armstrong was my sporting hero. The sense of immortality he exuded on the bike was like no other, I remember in 2003 when he hit the tarmac after tangling his handlebars with a fan bringing down Ivan Basso in the process. He then slipped his peddle nearly colliding with Basso again before sprinting back up to the leaders which to their credit slowed the pace waiting for the Maillot Jaune. He then went onto win the stage after launching a famous Armstrong attack. Watch it here.
Another moment from the 2003 Tour I will never forget is when Armstrong avoided a crashing Joseba Beloki whilst descending on Stage 9. He narrowly avoided the Spaniard managing to stay on his bike as he cycled across a field. Watch it here.
I loved this Lance, I grew up aspiring to him, worshipping him, believing him. Like so many others did. His story was amazing, cancer survivor turned TDF champion, why would you not want to believe in that? This is why he fooled us all for so long. It's fair to say he used his cancer as a way to keep the fans loyal and to stop the journalists from probing to deep into the secret, deceptive world of a professional cyclist. “If you consider my situation: a guy who comes back from arguably, you know, a death sentence, why would I then enter into a sport and dope myself up and risk my life again? That's crazy. I would never do that. No. No way." Audacious statement Mr, prepare to face the music. But what is baffling to me his how did he gain his unrivalled power within the peloton?
I can't put my finger on it. In 1999 Lance Armstrong failed a drugs test in which they found cortisone, this could have been the end of road for Armstrong, the journey coming to an abrupt end before it ever really began. However the UCI protected the shining light of cycling, the beacon of hope after 98's drug infused Tour. In Tyler Hamilton's 'The Secret Race' he spoke Armstrong's laid-back attitude towards the situation and how he found it humorous that he could get away with it. This is a prime example of the Armstrong arrogance.
"I hope it sends out a fantastic message to all survivors around the world. We can return to what we were before – and even better.” Did he ever consider the repercussions this message would have on all the people it once reached, because no matter how big the web of lies becomes or how long it traps the truth beneath the surface, one day it will escape. The truth will always prevail.
What makes him worse than every other cheat? First of I believe Lance Armstrong is a scapegoat. It seemed he very nearly overtook Osama Bin Laden on the US most wanted list. The main problem I have with him is the bullying and manipulating of other riders, his chronic need to win was almost psychotic. It wasn't enough for him to be doped but he needed all his lieutenants to be doped as well. You can almost imagine Postal had their own secret tagline 'Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If it doesn't though, pop an EPO and come fly with Lance and the boys.'
One thing that you can't dispute is that he was incredibly clever, he wasn't just ahead of the game, he changed the game. He left no stone unturned, he knew who had what doctor, who was in and out of shape, it wouldn't surprise me if he had CIA like agents running recon for him. With his millions he was the first to explore new methods, and was always one step ahead of everybody else. He didn't mind other riders flying high, but he wouldn't allow anybody breaching what was his exclusive mile-high club.
Lance clearly was following the saying 'Go Hard or Go Home', this was a choice that all professional cyclists of that era had to make. And the question I'll ask is, what would you have done? You've worked all your life to achieve your dreams and then just as your about to walk through the door your faced with a horrible reality. Walk away from the sport you love and give up your dreams, or step onto the tainted path of doping. Once that decision was made there was no turning back. I don't know when Armstrong was faced with that choice but he made it with a winning mentality, if he was going to do this he was going to do 'right', 100%. Fully committed.
After the compelling evidence was released that Armstrong had in-fact taken performance enhancing drugs I fought my hero's case with 'It was a level playing field' but secretly I knew this wasn't true. I understand why he still has his supporters because he gave people hope, he inspired the uninspired and he achieved a magnificent feat, with or without blood bags and popping EPO like tit-tacs.
I don't think I'd be writing this now if he did not come out of retirement in 2009. I have no doubt that he was doped during his comeback but he no longer controlled the game, the game had changed. Astana a team with a drug history was Armstrong suitor for his comeback TDF. Was that the Armstrong carelessness from 99 we were seeing again. His doubters probably had a field day. One of those doubters was Paul Kimmage, he was one of the few that turned his back on Pro Cycling when faced with the choice to dope or not to dope. Watch him have a verbal battle with Lance Armstrong before the Tour of California in 2009 here.
I so badly wanted to believe in the Lance Armstrong story, the fairytale of a clean rider defying the odds to win the most gruelling sporting event in the world. He lied, he cheated and he let people down, he let me down. I don't hate Lance Armstrong but I'm truly saddened by his actions, I will now forever look at those 21 stage wins & 7 Tour triumphs with different eyes, he has dirtied a great legacy.
I'm looking forward to watching his interview with Oprah in the early hours of Friday morning. I don't expect to hear a full admission, he will have answered every question he could possibly get asked with his lawyers beforehand and be told what he can and cannot say. Let's not forget, Armstrong loves control and he will be in control of this situation. One day I truly hope we see inside Lance Armstrong but I don't think that day will be tomorrow. Maybe when he fancies writing his bestseller, he'll make sure he's number 1 again. See even when he's losing he's figuring out how he can come out with his head above water and in a situation as sticky as this I would constitute that as a win.
...I'm currently reading 'Seven Deadly Sins' by David Walsh, once finished and after tomorrow's interview another piece will be written. I'll never not have a word to say about this fascinating man and topic.
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